When you’re online dating, first messages say a lot about who you are and what you’re looking for--even when the messages are short and sweet. One you might not be having much luck with is if you’re simply messaging women saying things like, “You’re pretty,” and nothing else. Why don’t compliments work as first messages?
When you tell a woman that you think she’s physically attractive, but write nothing else to her,the message conveyed is that you didn’t care enough to actually read her profile, or if you did, nothing really stood out to you as being worthwhile to ask her about. Simply commenting her on her appearance--something she, for the most part, doesn’t have much control over--could make her think that you are only interested in one thing, her looks.
Complimenting someone only on their appearance and not initiating conversation further can also imply that you’re not really interested in dating, just hooking up. If there’s no substantive conversation or pursuit of one, she may think that you’re just interested in finding out more about what she looks like, and not what she’s like as a person.
While this might seem a little over-thought, many women think like this--the “so what?” feeling when a message just says “You’re hot,” or some variant is common. Obviously you find her attractive if you’re messaging her. But what else? Elaborate, even with something simple. You can still pay her a compliment, but fleshing out the message is never a bad thing.
